Starting therapy is a courageous and hopeful decision. Whether you’re looking for support through a difficult season, healing from past pain, or working toward personal growth, taking the first step can feel both empowering and uncertain. One of the most important—and sometimes overlooked—factors in getting the most out of therapy is finding a therapist who feels like a good fit for you.

Research consistently shows that one of the strongest predictors of positive outcomes in therapy is not a particular approach or intervention, but rather the strength of the therapeutic relationship. Feeling a sense of rapport—mutual understanding, connection, and trust—creates a foundation for healing work to happen. It’s in this safe, collaborative relationship that people can begin to take emotional risks, explore vulnerable topics, and work through challenges.

Finding that connection, however, can take time. Sometimes you won’t know if a therapist is a good fit until you’ve had a few sessions. You might notice that it’s easier to open up, that you feel understood, or that you leave sessions feeling a little more grounded or hopeful. Other times, you might sense that the match isn’t quite right—and that’s okay. Therapy is deeply personal, and different styles, personalities, and approaches work better for different people.

If you don’t feel a strong connection or sense of safety, it’s more than okay to keep looking. A skilled therapist will not take it personally if you decide to seek support elsewhere. In fact, most therapists genuinely want you to find the person who can best support your growth and goals. Therapy is your space, and you deserve to feel empowered in choosing who walks with you on that path.

It can be helpful to reflect on what matters to you in a therapist. Do you feel more comfortable with someone who is warm and conversational, or someone who is more structured and direct? Are there specific qualities—like cultural understanding, lived experience, or clinical expertise—that are important to you? These preferences are valid and can guide you toward a more meaningful therapeutic experience.

Ultimately, the hope is not just that you find someone to talk to, but that you find someone who helps you build a life you feel proud of. A therapist who supports you in feeling more like yourself, in identifying what matters most, and in making the changes that move you toward a more fulfilled, connected life. You deserve that kind of care—and it’s worth taking the time to find it.